26 posts tagged “emo”

If you could teleport to any place in the world right this second, where would you go?

I would probably be in Memphis where my best friend is right now. He's been studying there for two years and only comes home during summer breaks his time here is limited and we barely see each other when he's back home. I want to see him badly since the last time I saw him was half a year ago. I would probably ask him the same questions I wanted to ask him for years now. Like, how he felt towards me and what he wanted to say during those times he hesitated and what questions he wanted to ask me but didn't had the time or the courage to. I want to spend the whole day with him, catch up and just hang out - do things we've never done before like jam or play video games or drive around town. Maybe have a decent picture together since we barely have passable ones.

hmm.. haven't wrote lately... well so much to do!! not as if i'm being all gc, actually i'm really neglecting my studies.. but i promise to change come next week! (after the so called one week vacation). right now i really stink.. i can smell myself really really bad.. wahaha! anyway, i've been watching heroes (marathon i tell you!!) and finished it just moments ago (yes the whole first season) and then i dLed Sophie Kinsella's Shopaholic Series... and then Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code, which i already read, and Angels and Demons and the last one which is Deception Point harhar.. it's not like i can read them all at once... but nonetheless. :P well for academics (yes i did some too) i'm currently dLing Deitel's Java: How to Program complete with a CD! cool! also well, CISCO Networking's reviewer some kind.. lolz... weeeee anyway, i still need to do my own erd for wed... and i'm pretty tired already, i've been lying in bed for the past few days watching and reading... T.T

o yeah, watched Close to You yesternight, more like i saw it airing on TV and i just had to watch it... made me go all emo again.. lolz! awww how i miss four-one (collective, even tho there are a lot that i don't miss about them, more like people i don't wan to associate with ever in my life...), our class watched that movie together at GateWay then... and we all cried! hahahaha! i miss my high school friends, i wish i could be still in high school... >.< i miss my best friend especially... BOTH of them if you're asking... :P but more of russ... T.T he's like half way around the world for god's sake... me and Val text and email each other in regular basis.. but him... nada... ugh... here i go again... T.T okaaaaaay stooooooooooop! hahaha it's called PMSing... russ is really good at that stuff... PMS... he's like a she... he's more a girl than i am... hahaha!

good times dude, good times.. \m/ >.<

Bubbly
    -Colbie Caillat

It starts in my soul
And I lose all control
When you kiss my nose
The feelin shows
Cause you make me smile
Baby just take your time
Holdin me tight

From this day forward

…and Harry's 11, in Madam Malkin's; and he's 12, in the Slytherin Common Room; and he's 13, watching Hermione take a swing; and he's 14, watching badges blink; and he's 15, facing Umbridge's squad; and he's 16, in the Astronomy Tower watching a wand lower; and he's 17, flying out of a fire; and he's 25, in that corner at the Ministry; and he's 37, putting their baby on the train; and he's 94, sleeping in that field by the Hollow; and he's 132, blowing candles out on his cake; and he's 1,000 years gone, pranking Peeves in the new Hogwarts; and every time he looks, there's blond hair and grey eyes and a Slytherin smile beside him…

And death won't us part

…and he can't breathe, can't think, can't speak, can't move, because Draco's giving him forever. Harry's never had forever in anything. Can't believe he'll get it in this. Good things never last in his life, but this will. This will. Draco's promised…

reading this, (yes i know it's harry/draco who cares!) my heart suddenly raced thinking -- i don't want to grow old, may i be alone or with the person i loved the most. and i don't wanna die either, or rather die old. i don't wanna die uncapable.. i dowana die that old... T.T

i've been in denial for almost a year, simply because i thought he was a better man. he wouldn't back out from his word, he wouldn't do it to me, he'd never leave me, he'd come back, he said he love me.... those were the thoughts that constantly plagued my mind. i refused to acknowledge that there'd be someone he loves aside from me, or that he loves someone that isn't me. i always hoped and thought that when this is all over, like college, he'll be back here and he'll come back for me. every thing will be back to normal. i always thought he'll be my first and last boyfriend, and perhaps i'll also be his. i thought we'll never be apart, always thought that i still have this major role in his life.

but perhaps i've been blinding myself to believe those sweet candy coated dreams. why so? do i really love him that i'll be like this? or is it because i just don't want to be hurt like before thus making him my escape. my reason, my alibi not to fall. perhaps someone to blame as to why i'm like this? maybe so.

they kept on asking me, why not the other one? why don't you want to have a boyfriend? are you going to wait for him? those questions were frightening, i don't even know how to answer them. i just felt that it wasn't the time to give up, or maybe move on, whichever. but there's no stepping stone for me, no pedestal, no finish line.

what if someone won him over? while i've been battling myself dignity and pride? what if he cam back after four years not because of me but to be with someone else? how would i react? like that Moena from the bachelor paris? would i need a psychoanalyst to fix me up?

my best friend sent me a quote, says something like this: one day someone will make you realize why it just didn't work out with others. or something similar.

i always thought that someone would take me away from my misery, it's either him or my prince charming. but i'd choose him even if that other person can buy me the world.

i dunno, maybe it's time to find someone else? am i that closed minded that i refuse to see others values? why? is it because i need closure? isn't closure already given? i dunno..

maybe i'm asking something like, i have someone else already... and it's not you alex, it was never you.

When it Rains
    -Paramore

And oh, oh, how could you do it?
Oh I, I never saw it coming.
Oh, oh, I need the ending.
So why can't you stay
Just long enough to explain?

uhm. yeah, emo mode... too many things to say so i'll just shut my trap for the better part...

i've alwas been emo towards him. go figure. pero naman kasi unreasonable!!!

un lang,

i hate it when people don't have time for me, because i always find time for them... especially him... tae...

i'll just read my harry potter 7!! :D go to hell russ...

as much as i love you because you're my best friend.. i feel bitter towards you for the longest time... because you always said that i don't have time for you, when you're the one who's not having time to spare.

napaka hypocrytal.... really, ask anyone... i'd rather choose anything that concerns you than another day to live...

i miss not having to write here... there are too many things to do... all i can write are short rants... grrrrrrrrrrr

what's happening?

what ever happened to you russ?

and don't give me the crap about people change. damn it, i used that line.. you really have no originality

nakakaasar ang sarap sigurong burahin na siya sa lahat ng bagay.. tipong sa friendster, sa multiply sa ym!!!! wla na siya sa cellphone ko, sana pati sa lahat wala na siya...

para pag may magtanung kamusta si......

sinong ........?? wala akong kilalang ..........

o diba? hahaha

i just got home from the hospital... yeah, stayed there for a week, my mom had a mestectomy... i don't wanna ellaborate any further... but good news is everything's alright with her. atleast one of us is happy... and i'd really really give up everything i have just for her...

i was a little over the edge over the week... brought by so much stress from school and well my mom's health... and well lack of sleep. really, bitchy little me came out a little more than expected.. hahaha! i was really moody. i even kind of pushed away someone a lot of times. i'm not sorry for my actions, because it was my prerogative to do it. but i was really somewhat pissed at some of the people who just can't take a hint.

they kept on pushing me, over and over again. damn, a little more and i'll just really snap. :O i don't want to, but it can't be helped. they caused it. i've been so patient... damn it. too patient.

sabi ko nga eh kay rigor eh, kung pipilitin mo masasakal ako, kakawala ako. don't make it to the point that he and i will treat eachother as strangers. because i don't want that.

time's up for both of us... it passed... even tho it was too quick, it's just over. i gave an effort, god and martoni knows i did, but i think it's just not meant to work out. especiall with you lot always nosing around.. lolz! :D

but don't misunderstand, you guys are still my friends. that won't change. :D